User blog:Brawler19/Top 10 Least Favorite ERBs
Hello folks. It's me, Brawler19, otherwise known as the guy who lives under a rock. I've been wanting to do a list like this for a while, and since I've got nothing better to do, I believe now's a good time to make it. Today I've compiled a list of my 10 least favorite Epic Rap Battles, the ten battles that I myself aren't too fond off. Now, you might be wondering why I'm doing my least favorite before my absolute favorites, but as TheMysteriousMrEnter said, "It's easier to explain what's wrong with a broken machine, than explaining why a machine is working correctly." I stand by that statement, and that's why I'm making this list instead of a favorites list. Now, since this is an opinion-based list, many of you guys are going to disagree with me on many things. I can already assure you guys that some of your favorites are going to be on this list, while some of your personal least favorites may not. I ask that you please respect my opinion and be mature about what problems you might have with my selection. I can see why some people would like the battles I list here, and I respect that, so I hope you may do the same. Also, I'd like to clerify that I don't '''hate '''any ERBs, and I don't mean to sound ungrateful or spiteful towards Peter and Lloyd and the entire ERB crew. I find all battles to be enjoyable in their own right, and I appreciate what ERB has done for us. These are just the battles that I enjoy less than the others. Anyway, starting with the best of my least favorites: #10-George Washington vs. William Wallace I'll be honest, when I look back at season 3, I consider it to be my least favorite season so far. Sure Stephen King vs. Edgar Allen Poe was awesome, and the second half of the season was the best part of it, but it still felt lacking in some ways, and the preamble to the finale wasn't exactly helping. Now, this was a battle I was really looking forward to. I always wanted William Wallace to be used in ERB, and George Washington was a good opponent for him. I got really excited when hints pointed towards this battle happening, but sadly, I was very underwhelmed, and it's probably my main reason for not liking this battle. I know that's a very petty reason for not liking it, but it's just my opinion. The battle was decent though to be fair. The costumes were good and lyrics were well written. But what I didn't like about the battle was the beat. When I think of Washington vs. Wallace, a battle between two revolutionists who fought against the British for freedom, I expect a grand, powerful beat, with pounding drums and bass and stuff like that. Instead, we got some weird techno beat with no weight to it. It didn't feel big, it didn't feel powerful, it just felt weak. While it was good in it's own way, it just wasn't as good as I would've hoped. #9-Miley Cyrus vs. Joan of Arc Is it ever wonder why people don't care for women rap battles? This is coming from a guy who likes women battles more than most. Hell, I'd go as far as to say Cleopatra vs. Marilyn Monroe was one of my favorite battles of season 2. But man, this battle just didn't help lessen the negative view of women battles. Let's start off with the biggest problem, the match-up. Joan of Arc, a person I also wanted to see for the longest time, was wasted on Cyrus. Think of all the women Joan could've gone up against. I personally would've chosen Mulan. Sure the connection would be more obvious, but it would be a closer connection than the one they went with. Second, the beat it annoying, and there's way too much techno in it. Thrid, Joan was just weak. Not too much in the acting, just the lyrics felt pathetic compaired to Miley. While I will give props to Michelle Glaven and Jessi Smiles for their portrayals of Cyrus and Joan, as well as the costumes, I still just find this battle to be wasted potential. Nothing much else to say honestly. #8-John Lennon vs. BIll O'Reilly As the first ERB to be officially made, it's obviously not the best. Still, it was a good start for the series, but there are flaws here, obviously. The beat, while decent, is kinda weak, and the costumes aren't the best. The lyrics aren't too great either. Again, I understand this was the beginning, and they didn't have too much of a budget, and honestly, for what little money they had, they still pulled off something better than anything I could ever do. Yeah, this could be considered picking the low hanging fruit, and yeah, it is. I mean, putting the first battle on a least favorite list? That's kind of an asshole move, right? Still, I just wouldn't put this battle in a playlist anytime soon. #7-Darth Vader vs. Adolf Hitler 2 The Hitler vs. Vader trilogy is the biggest running theme in ERB (Next to the heroin joke). The first one was good with a good beat and good lyrics, and good costumes. The third one many consider to be the best, and I'd have to agree, though it seemed a tad uneven. Though to be fair, the second one was even more titled, this time in Hitler's favor. One thing I really don't like in a rap battle is when one side seems superior to the other, like in Bieber vs. Beethoven, where it was so unfair to Bieber that it just got boring. Sure, Bieber's an ass, but still. This was in the same boat in my opinion. Not only did Hilter get more lines than Vader, he had the most disses. All Vader did was talk about how badass he is, while Hitler actually insulted Vader. It seemed like they were trying to make Hitler win, though that may've been the case. Granted, they could've started season 2 a lot worse, but as a sequel to the then most viewed rap battle, I wish it would've been a bit more fair. #6-Adam vs. Eve Yeah, you all saw this coming. Easily the most despised battle ERB has made, Adam vs. Eve was not a good way to start the end of season 2. Now, let me be frank here. I actually don't hate this battle. Like I said, I don't hate any battles. But Adam vs. Eve is just a pitiful battle. First off, the concept is the dumbest ever. The Battle of the Sexes thing is the stupidest arguement I can think of. Who cares which sex is better? Both sexes have positives and negatives, let's just leave it at that. So, what exactly is wrong with this battle? Well, there're the lyrics first of all. ERB has a thing where they write lyrics that have some kind of history in them, but also makes them funny. Some of the best rap battles have a good amount of history thrown into the lyrics, but this battle...well...it does not. It's nothing but dick and menstruation jokes. Nothing witty, just, that. That's this battle's biggest crime, the fact that it's not an intelligant battle like so many other ones are. Sure at least most of the other battles have wit and history in the mix, so this is really the only battle that's like this. But still, it's not a good battle. If it were more mature and smart, then it would've been a lot better. But then again, how can you really be mature and smart in something as stupid as Battle of the Sexes? #5-Artists vs. TMNT This is where my choices really start to get controversial. I remember back when season 3 had come to a close and this was out, everyone went nuts over it. They said it was the best battle of season 3 and some even said it was the best finale. I dissagree with those statements greatly. First, I didn't think it was the best. In fact, I thought it was one of the worst. The whole thing was just an underwhelming experiance. People may complain that Goku vs. Superman or Shaka Zulu vs. Ceasar was too short, but I thought they were longer than this battle was. This battle was just too short. Way too short. Especially for a finale. The past finales had a good run time, but this one just didn't. Then as for the finale statement, Rasputin vs. Stalin was head and shoulers over this one. This was also yet again a lopsided battle with the Artists destroying the Turtles so badly. It wasn't even funny how tilted it was. True, ERB has a habit of making the older guys win (Beethoven, Lincoln, Wright Brothers), but this felt different than that. It's not that ERB made the TMNT lose on purpose, I believe Peter and Lloyd expressed that they liked the Turtles growing up, but the Turtles just had terrible lines. The Artists were well done though, and credit to Sulai Lopez for the costumes and stuff. Rhett, Link, Anthony, and Ian all look like the actual Artists themselves. The Turle costumes are awesome too, and Xin Wuku did an awesome job with the stunts. And judging from the BTS video for this battle, they all had a blast shooting this thing, and I'm really happy they had fun. While it wasn't awful, I just wouldn't consider this the best battle of season 3. Sorry guys. #4-Hulk Hogan vs. Kim Jong-il Show of hands. Who actually remembers that this battle exists? This came out during a darker period for ERB, which was ironically right after the series started. Most of the battles then weren't that great and were very forgettable. This specific battle was no exception. First off, the connection here still makes no sense. Hell, I don't even remember what it was. All I know is that I was confused about it before, and I still am to this day. The beat is also kinda meh. Not terrible, but not great either. The acting is fine though. Hogan and Macho Man were pretty fun to watch, especially Macho Man, and the costumes, for the limited budget they had back then, were pretty good, even if the Hulk Hogan costume was kinda obvious. It was kinda funny at times too. Honestly, I'm not really sure what else to say about this battle. It kinda speaks for itself I guess. Sorry for being a bit vague with this one, but it's kinda hard to come up with a reason why I dislike this battle. Basically everyone else isn't too fond of it, and they could probably explain why that it better than me. This one is just a bore. Plain and simple. Category:Blog posts